learning

I’M DOING  MY BEST TO SHOW UP FOR EVERYTHING IN LIFE.  BUT THE TRUTH IS, SOMETIMES I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT I’M DOING.

There, I said it.

Sometimes I don’t know what I’m doing.

Like absolutely no freaking idea.

And that’s ok.

Cause honestly, I’ve never been a Mum to a 9 and 7 year old before.

I’ve never been in a relationship with the same person for 15 years before.

I’ve never been 41 before.

I’ve never had a business that earns as much as this one does.

I’ve never mastered reels.

I’ve never navigated homestay orders while a virus dictates government decisions.

I’ve never had to wear all the hats I do now, in the way I do now.

I’ve never before taught yoga and felt really truly deeply good at it.

I’ve never before felt this way.

I’ve never had this many tools.

I’ve never had the level of recovery I do today.

I’ve never ever been right here, in this moment that is now ever, ever before.

NEVER.

There’s a lot of firsts happening right now.

Some of them full of joy.

Some uncomfortable.

Some downright painful.

Some are just well, you know, whatever.

All of them offering me something should I choose to take a mindset that allows that.

I’m not beating myself about this sometimes not knowing what I’m doing thing. Because honestly, like I’ve just said, I’ve never been here before. Never.

How could I have? Here has never even existed before. And I’ve never been this me before this moment.

And that’s the thing. We gotta keep meeting ourselves where we are, with what we’ve got. Meeting life and our relationships with what they’re presenting, with the best of what we’ve got.

And so sometimes, when we don’t know what we’re doing, that’s absafuckinglutely ok.

So, if you’re feeling like this too sister, I see you. I got you. And if feeling like this is messing with your head I invite you to connect at emma@emma-mccann.com